Growing Old… Growing Up

Last night someone said: ‘Growing Old is Compulsory. Growing Up is Optional.’ I’ve heard the saying, in different forms, many times over the years… attributed to Walt Disney, Robin Williams, Bob Monkhouse…

It suggests:

Growing Old is Compulsory: [MS1] Growing old is about the passage of time, As our bodies get older we experience aches and pains. Our mind isn’t so sharp, we slow down a little. Aging is natural, unavoidable, inevitable.

Growing Up is Optional… Growing up is more about our attitude. A joyful energy and youthful enthusiasm for life is to be encouraged. We should embrace new ideas and opportunities, retain a child’s sense of wonder and delight, not take life too seriously.

And yet…

Growing Old is Compulsory… Many sadly don’t have the option of getting old. Over the weekend there were reports of children who’d died in road traffic accidents, young people who’d taken their own lives, young parents who’d died of cancer…

Many fear getting old. The cosmetics industry in all its forms seeks to prevent aging. Many desperately wish they looked younger, felt younger, were younger.

Recent conversations with families suffering through the presence of dementia or a terminal diagnosis suggests to me that ‘Growing old is compulsory’ seems to trivialise the pain and suffering involved in the aging process.

Growing Up is Optional… Parents, grandparents, teachers encourage children to become mature, developing responsible attitudes to themselves, others, life… We want children to grow up,

I taught children who cared for sick parents. Before school they’d do the washing; at the end of the school day they’d cook the tea. Growing up wasn’t optional.

Recently we’ve observed young couples with their first baby, taking responsibility for a young life. For them growing up isn’t optional.

I know middle aged folks– making tough decisions regarding the future of elderly parents… facing redundancy after many years of employment… living with failed marriages, broken family relationships. Life’s made them grow up…

…Still musing… ‘Growing old is compulsory, growing up is optional’… I’ve very mixed feelings!