In ‘From Wild Man To Wise Man’ Richard Rohr writes: ‘Much of the human race experiences an immense father hunger. It is felt by women, but even more so by men…’ He continues: ‘Father hunger often becomes a full-blown father wound…’
He tells of a sister who ministered in Lima’s central prison. As Mother’s Day approached many men asked her for Mother’s Day cards… but not one man asked for a Father’s Day card.
‘She realised then – and she told me this story with tears in her eyes – that most of the men were in jail because they had no fathers. Not that they were orphans, but they had never been fathered…’
Musing on…
…friends living with father wounds: Adults scarred by their childhood experiences of their father’s absence, rejection, abuse… Families with fostered or adopted children wounded by their fathers… Children hurt and damaged by the lack of consistent fathering.
…my years of teaching. I was fortunate to spend many years in a school with good male role models – teachers, support staff, our caretaker… On the sports field, in the workshop, in the ordinariness of everyday life, there were good father-figures.
…Clive’s funeral a few weeks ago. Clive’s son spoke clearly, emotionally, honestly, of his father’s kindness, gentleness, generosity, example that he both benefitted from and learnt from. These weren’t just fine words. We all knew Clive and knew they were true.
…My own father who died many years ago. He taught me what it is to be a good husband, father, grandfather, Christian… not by what he said, but by who he was. I’ve talked with my brothers about his faults… but he did an excellent job of fathering us.
…David describing his God as a ‘father to the fatherless’… Jesus teaching us to pray ‘our Father in heaven’… Paul describing us as God’s children who cry ‘Abba Father’… John speaking of ‘fellowship with the Father’ and ‘the love of the Father’.
…Me, responding as a father to my Father God.
malcolmsmusings.org 
Thank you for writing this, Malcolm, and for making me remember my own Dad.
My Dad wasn’t perfect like our Heavenly Father is perfect . . . but our Dad took us to church, remained faithful to our Mom throughout their 45 years of marriage, provided for us materially and emotionally, and he set a good example for us that was not erased just because he, like each of us, had his own share of sins that he struggled against.
One of my most cherished memories of our Dad was walking past our parents’ bedroom during my first year of law school when we were living with our parents and seeing him alone on his knees at the foot of their bed silently praying . . . for all of his children, I’m sure.
I wish that everyone was blessed by God to have a Dad like ours. But thank God that we all have our Father who loves us so perfectly that He gave us His Son!
https://themjkxn.substack.com/p/smsgt-joseph-jay-hessinger-usaf
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It’s good for me to remember my Dad, Mark. It reminds me of my roots, and reminds me of one of the many but important things for which I am grateful.
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I can so identify with this Malcolm. Thank you for sharing it brother.
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Thanks, Fred. I can certainly recommend the Richard Rohr book.
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This old, abandoned ragamuffin father is ordering a copy brother. Thank you.
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You’re post message is spot on. Children need fathers in their lives-and they don’t have to be perfect! 🙂
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I know it’s not always possible for a father to be there – for all sorts of reasons, Nancy. I do think that It is important for all children (and adults!) to have positive male role models.
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Thanks for sharing this idea with this book. Anita
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Thank you, Anita. It’s certainly worth reading.
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