Both Sides Now – Love and Marriage

Moons and Junes and Ferris wheels
The dizzy dancing way you feel
As every fairy tale comes real
I’ve looked at love that way

But now it’s just another show
You leave ’em laughing when you go
And if you care, don’t let them know
Don’t give yourself away

Jodi Mitchell sees the fairy-tale, dizzy, dancing, Disney-perfect love. All will live happily ever after.

The beautiful, fairy-tale princess often loves the ‘wrong man’; Belle, the Beauty, loves the beast; the girl kisses the frog; Christine loves the Phantom of the Opera.

The man needs to change from the beast, frog or phantom.

Harry Benson writes: ‘…the future of each marriage seems to be largely in the hands of the husband. It’s invariably the husband who needs to step up to the plate, to start being kind to his wife, or stop being defensive, or end the affair, or cut down on his drinking.’

George’s marriage ended in a messy divorce; his second marriage seems good.

Steve had an affair; after a tricky time he is back in a happy and stable marriage.

Pete’s marriage is fragile; separated from his wife the future is uncertain.

Jeff’s wife died three years ago. After suffering from depression he is gradually putting his life back together again.

Terry has been married 3 times. He currently has another partner…

Real men with real families. Mistakes bring heartbreak, deep wounds and scars.

I’ve looked at love from both sides now
From give and take, and still somehow
It’s love’s illusions I recall
I really don’t know love at all

Love is simple yet profound, perfect yet illusionary, available yet elusive.

Despite my tendency to be a beast, frog or phantom I’m with St Paul: ‘And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.’


Both Sides Now by Joni Mitchell (1967)

‘What mums want (and dads need to know)’ by Harry Benson – Premier Christianity 3rd Jan 2017; with his wife Kate he wrote a book with the same title.

George, Steve, Pete, Jeff & Terry are real men – not their real names.

1 Corinthians 13:13

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